Propriety

I'm learning new things. Truly they are very old things. But one can not refute the fact that they are important things in any case.

When I was a child, I told my grandmother about my best friend. She responded to my cheerful talk with a somber "I don't have those kinds of friends."

Followed by words of advice.

"The only secrets I have are between me and the Lord."

Good grief

I dismissed her talk as old woman's talk. Sometimes grandmothers can be such downers!

For some time now, I have become more aware of the wisdom of those words.
I'm learning that I really need to keep my opinions more carefully guarded. To appear to have no opinion at all really. In almost all things.

This used to be so hard for me to do, keeping my mouth shut. It is becoming more easy as the days go by. I'm finally learning to play at politics.

Of course, I still have my blog to regurgitate all over.

Finished

Sort of.

I've done reading, and re-reading the latest installment of Harry Potter. While most people that I know seem to be depressed, I am quite joyful. I am very much looking forward to the encyclopedia, and hope that Rowling will find the energy and desire to bless us with another book from that world.


In the meantime...I was blessed with a fellowship to further my studies, and am still excited about my research.

also, I think my cat eats toilet paper.

On Hiatus

Need I say more???

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."

Anaïs Nin

Pizza overload

My site has received a large jump in visitors this week. Curious to know why, I checked it out and found that the Pizza love connection" post was the reason.

Almost all recent visitors have come to the page by way of a google search term for the word "pizza".

Who knew that more than 100 people would be interested in a picture of a pizza?

Curse of the Were Rabbit

I'm back on this kick again....

I wonder if there are more movies in the series....

A better role model

Today while talking to my niece (the 6 year old superstar) I was surfing. On the internet. Noticing my lapse in attention, she asked what I was doing. I told her the truth...goofing around on the internet, just surfing around. She then asked,
"Science stuff?"
I smiled.

I never talk to her about what I do...I suppose she has asked her parents and maybe eavesdropped on some of our conversations. I was quite flattered and impressed with her.

The pizza-love connection

According to this article, I am:
1. irritable, prone to procrastination, and they often “forget” obligations and

2. aggressive, ambitious, and competitive


My pizza order choices are one of three (plain cheese, pepperoni, or a multiple topping pizza with pineapples) and so I chose the "characteristics" that are supposed to reflect me.

Am I bitter or does it seem as if Riki just wants more people to be vegetarians?

By Riki Markowitz
Think a candlelit dinner is the best venue to suss out a date’s potential? Well, a new study claims that ordering a good ol’ pizza pie can be much more telling. “Pizza-eaters’ favorite toppings show a correlation to their behavior,” says Alan Hirsch, M.D., lead researcher and director of the Smell & Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago. Commissioned by Domino’s Pizza, the study polled 1,000 people between the ages of 18 to 59 about their pizza-eating preferences and behavioral characteristics. Read the findings below to find out what certain toppings say about you, your date, and your future together.

If your date orders one meat topping…
People who order just pepperoni or sausage on their pie are generally irritable, prone to procrastination, and they often “forget” obligations (like that weekend getaway he or she promised to take with you in the spring).
Compatible with: others who prefer one meat topping

If your date orders multiple meat toppings…
Real meat lovers who pile on the pepperoni, sausage, and ham tend to be dramatic, seductive, sweep-you-off-your-feet extroverts who thrive as the center of attention.
Compatible with: people who prefer one meat topping

If your date orders one veggie topping…
Those who prefer one vegetable topping are empathetic, easygoing romantics.
Compatible with: everybody!

If your date orders multiple veggies…
These dates are trustworthy, loyal, humble, and avoid the spotlight. In fact, they’re so quiet and conflict-averse they tend to be taken for granted in relationships.
Compatible with: people who prefer non-traditional toppings

If your date orders non-traditional toppings…
People who prefer offbeat options like pineapple or extra onions tend to be aggressive, ambitious, and competitive. In other words: Don’t expect a mellow relationship.
Compatible with: others who prefer non-traditional toppings

Advanced Midnight Screening?

yeah..all up in that.

I simply can't wait to read the last installment, though, Rowling had me boo-hooing at the end of the last book. How the hell do you kill Dumbledore? I mean how is that done really?

I kept thinking about the clock that he gave Hermione to go back in time...wondering why the hell no one was using it to kick Snapes behind. Go figure.

I Remember You

How, how we carried on
How I used to walk with you
And talk with you
Until I moved away
Oh, although some things may change
Others stay the same
We're not four anymore
But can you come out and play

There was a guy I attended college with that, for all of freshman year, I had a huge HUGE crush on. Unfortunately for me, he was attached to his high school sweetheart. Still, upon finding out I had a crush on me, he went out of his way to make sure that I knew we were still cool, and we became closer friends than ever.

We'd often have lunch together, or hang around about campus...in the Orange room, the dorms, the Student Union, or studying in the library. We'd discuss articles he'd clip with me in mind, or current events. We would talk about relationships in particular and in general. We would also talk television...he had an addiction.

I moved on and moved through various other relationships and crushes after hearing of his sweetheart but we stayed fast friends. My fondest memories of FAMU include him.

Whenever I listen to the song "I remember you" by Brian Mcknight, I think about him.

If too much time passed between our meeting, he'd come by my dorm and call my room. When I answered, the greeting I most often heard was, "Can you come out and play?"
And I would. Every time. We'd watch t.v. and talk, or just walk around. He would sing a Fred Rogers song sometimes....a complete kid at heart.

At some point in sophmore year, we started an ongoing game of tag. He'd touch me, and I was "it". The simple way that he'd touch me let me know the game was on... One finger to the upper arm...with a twist. That annoying twist that MADE me have to tag him back. We'd run around (much to the annoyance of his room mates) throwing things at one another sometimes, ducking and diving to tag the other.

Big fun.
Big Mike.
I miss him this weekend.
I wonder if he thinks of me too.
I hope he is well
I remember you Mike.

Daughters

Something that I've noticed about myself:

No matter how nice a thing my father does for my stepmother. No matter how decent a man he is to her. I always look at that thing and say to myself, "you are not doing ____ for my mother, so it doesn't matter."

I wonder how normal that is.

I know that at some point, a couple of years ago maybe, he tried to help me make better decisions about choosing men to date. I was listening to him talk, agreeing in my head with each and everything he said. Then, he said, "I don't cheat on my wife". And that was it, he lost me. It wasn't that I couldn't realize the truth of what he was saying...it was just that she wasn't my mother whom he had also been married to and whom he had (at some point) been unfaithful to. He wasn't a philanderer. He wasn't in the streets at all hours of the day and night. For all practical points and purposes, he is a good man. Its just that, in my mind, anything he does for a woman that isn't my mother isn't good. It doesn't count at all in his favour. As a matter of fact, it is actually bad.

I wonder if all daughters are twisted in this way.

New prescription

I went to the optometrists today... As a nearsighted person, this isn't a particularly strange or exciting trip to take. I'd promised that before I broke down and did this again however, I would visit a surgeon to see about getting lasik. My glasses broke yesterday. There went that.

I went to Martha's Vineyard with the black students yesterday. Pooh was invited, and actually came along. We mostly lounged in the sun...bunch of bums we were. It was still cool. I suppose whatever issues I had about not belonging are no longer real to me.

Why lord

I ran experiments. They don't work. A lot is riding on them. I am totally freaked. Like totally....

The laboratory and me

I am pitiful. I'm being tossed another publication. The measure of the success of any scientist worth his/her salt is the almighty publication. I haven't read any of the background for this publication...even though my professor in his computer addictedness has been all to happy to relieve his jones by forwarding me reference after reference.

He has had me running experiments for another project and forwarding articles for those as well...I read those... but just enough to design the experiments and be succesful at the bench.

I have had time to read for both...I just haven't turned off the television. (I have DVR..what is the problem sister?)

And, when I made up my mind to go in early, I became ill. Another middle of the night lab session. Baaahhh.

Anyways. My job for this week is to learn each and every cell responsible for making the retina work. It is also to read these new publications and order the new antibodies. I WILL accomplish this by Friday.

No TV for you!!!
Tape your shows for the week girl and keep it turned off until you accomplish your goals.

You freaking bum...

A thas my song turn it up

Just because it is sooooo Funny. This song cracks me up into 50 leben pieces. From the point that he falls out on the dance floor (mind you he already doesn't have any shoes on) then gets up on the bar, I'm in stitches. I'm sure he wants to be taken seriously when he talks about his grillz and stuff...but whateva...

Hurricane Chris - A Bay Bay

Gotta be setting records here

Probably not though....I have just been jabbering with cup. We've been going through songs in our respective cities trying to see what is hot in each region. I thought I would add two of my other current favs...the first is by Fantasia...I still can't believe her momma named her that name, only black people can get away with an original name like that..and rock it.

Fantasia - When I See You

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This is such a sweet and pretty song. I've totally been here too.. btw, do you see any link between this video and the last?

Lovin' It

I love this guys voice...On each album, Tank will give me One....repeat ONE song that I can listen to because it isn't just nasty... I admit this one tore me up when I listened to the lyrics...(Ion't know why bruthas can't act right---soooo many memories) but I still love it.

Tank - Please Don't Go

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Don't you just love the way he never drives the car in the video...

Shud be asleep

Yes, I should but characteristically at 3 am, I woke up. Some things never change.
Something about the middle of the night makes me want to do "true confessions" posts. And, although I might re-classify this post later....placing it in the X-files..I'm going to go ahead and spill my guts to the world. My readership is sufficiently low enough that I am not worried about ramifications.

I'm lonely.I suppose in a sense that this is a theme that reoccurs....me and loneliness. You have seen me regurgitate musings on the matter here time and again.

It isn't the sort of dangerous loneliness that I experienced last year (I swear I'm glad that year is gone). Its more of a subtle loneliness that passes when I bury myself in work. The kind that reminds you it is there when you least expect it. Like a bruise on your leg that you accidentally brush against a chair every now and again.
I don't fit in here.

I found out where the black people were, and joined the organizations I was supposed to join. I was even nominated for president. I didn't win, but that isn't what bugs me. What bothers me is that outside of the school events, I'm not invited to socialize with them. My mom is totally right. I spend almost all of my time here alone...or in the laboratory.

It hurts. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I suppose that right now it hurts as much as it ever does, and I can attest to the fact that really, I'm alright. I know that this is going to pass.

Still, the pressing pain is pushing me towards a desire to commit. To be committed to. To just step away from the game. What is odd is the fact that I always turn things in on myself when I hurt. I always go to the same places, scratching the same wounds, creating deeper scars. I hate the negative self talk. I hate that it was put into my head by one of the people who was supposed to teach me to withstand it.

I'm strong though.

I'm forging new friendships outside of the black clique here. Most importantly, I have comitted myself to more time in the lab, more experiments, more writing and reading. Yes, right now it hurts, but I know that this will all ultimately lead up to a very big positive in other areas of my life.

I'm it, again

So, NYCWeboy tagged me... You know how these things are...You've seen some of my answers before, but I can give you the remix.
I'll jump right to the point:

Four Jobs I've Had:
1. Ticket taker at the movie theater
2. R.A. in the dorm
3. R.A. in an assisted living facility
4. Assistant in a teachers inservice office



Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over:
1. Nanny McPhee
2. Aladdin
3. Harry Potter (all of them)
4. Any Jane Austen flick

Four Place I've Lived:
1. Syracuse
2. Chicago









3. Quincy, FL
4. East Lansing, MI

Four Places I've Vacationed:
1. New Orleans
2. Chicago
3. San Diego
4. St. Croix

Four of My Favorite Dishes:
1. Spaghetti
2. Toast with Butter
3. Cheese and Crackers/grapes (the green ones)
4. Smothered pork chops and rice

Four Sites I Visit Daily:
1. My school email
2. My blog
3. Hotmail
4. Cnn.com

Four Places I Would Rather Be Right Now:
1. At home with my family
2. In Nashville with my friends
3. Right where I am
3. In the warm, loving arms of my intended (still!)